Marching Onward

Whew!

The last few weeks have been trying in that I have been dodging bullets in just about every form and fashion.... but really, I guess I expected the onslaught of difficulties to come swiftly and powerfully given what I have committed to full time.  A few things...
- computer hard drive crash
- denial of health insurance due to unfounded (and unbeknownst to me) medical diagnosis
- ministry website elements still remain unfixed after months
- cancelled and/or rescheduled conferences/concerts
   ... and the list goes on....

However, there have been lots of wonderful opportunities presented in this season of serious faith walking...
- Fantastic performance workshop with Tom Jackson where I sang for some Nashville A&R, management companies and consultants... resulted in positive feedback and follow up meetings.
- Offered several great opportunities to sing, speak around lots of different regions in the country, a TV show in Atlanta and radio opportunities in South Carolina, Texas, Kentucky.
- New connections every day in women's ministries across the country - Kay Arthur, Kim Bolton, Kay deKalb Smith, Ginger Moore, Alice Breuer, Jennifer Devlin, Linda Goldfarb, Joyce Oglesby, Patty Mason, Jane Pistole, Erica Lane and so many more...

I am blessed.  Of this, I am sure.

I ask for continued prayer as I am faced everyday with the fact that I am that jar of clay as Paul writes in his letter to the Corinthians but I know that inside is where the good stuff is.  The treasure of God's word and His work in my life serves as an example of what He is able to do... immeasureably more than we can ever hope or imagine.  In the practicalities of life that seem to get in the way of ministry and at times, seem to bog down and even stagnate my heart, we remember that ...

"We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." - 2 Corinthians 4:8-9

We are not destroyed but being fashioned into a more hearty and readily available follower of Christ.  I find warfare around every corner.  This ministry thing is not easy nor is it just for "funsies".  It makes me have to be brave and walk straight up the middle of the battlefield.  He is requiring more faith and dependence from me that He WILL get me, bruises, band-aids and all, to the other side of that mountain I am climbing. 

"I believe, Lord please help my unbelief."  I get that guy in Mark's gospel now.  I think the present day translation might be... "I DO believe, but Lord, I'm skeered!!!"  I know this is what I am called to do but even in the confidence of this knowledge, how is it that fear is always right under the surface making me question the words I hear, the calling I know, the choices I make...  Does anyone know what I am talking about? 

And so I walk, one step at a time, slowly ambling the path laid out for me, trying not to lag behind and run ahead of Him and tempted to do both... each step further along my journey and closer to my Lord.  I see joy and tears, highs and lows, life and death, fruit and baggage... it's all there.  And so is He.

I am blessed.  Of this, I am sure.